Triptych II
One: (Re)birth
Requiem aeternam dona eis
time’s markers undulate into the blue
releasing textures to respire through
each surface falls deforming just on cue
et lux perpetua luceat eis
sweet hymn of passage passing now through me
I yield to you, no longer can I flee
no longer shirk the solemn duty: see
lux perpetua
how long? how long? And then the words recede
alone with a disintegrating need
to recollect the sacrificing deed
perpetua
eternity becomes a man of pride
alive, having forgotten that I died
Two: Redemption
The weight of days before was bearing down –
that I refused to make your pain my own
required that the consequence be shown
so delicately turbulence appeared
deceptive heightened stillness inward peered
and stiller seemed as dark immenseness neared
an offering, a gesture – but too small
mind’s ears cannot ignore the growing call
to stop, finally into yourself to fall
naked, sobbing into a bloody pool
your agony proves me a helpless fool
we weep together as your eyes grow weak
inheriting a blessed patience meek
and for a moment, flashing, seem to speak
‘i’ll wait forever’ silently they say
‘believing there will come a joyous day
when all your wondrous love i can repay’
‘that day is now!’ I beg, and with a heave
I bear you, gasping, these dark fears to leave
forgiveness now becomes our shared reprieve
our suffering was the only way to see:
the gift of saving you was what saved me
Three: Rite of Passage
Just one tonight, the moderation wins
one cannot bring me face to face with sins
or shatter now into a thousand thens
but quickly time slows down, the test begins
here now the corresponding thousand whens
confront me with their resonating dins
you ask an easy question, in your grace
I see kind worry on your distant face
I try, but haunting fears are in this place
all preparation rendered worthless now
I only have my naked self to show
a shuddering wind tears tears and sweat away
and with them go the pride of yesterday
it whips tempesting, softest tendrils flay
I know now that my claims to know were vain
my ill-considered, fevered words profane
the cause of boundless, overlooked pain
a quiet faltering, and here I lie
perhaps from my own small mistake to die
not knowing even tiny hints of why
the first and smallest moment spent with thee
was bliss enough for all eternity
a breath of air, the last perhaps, before
the parting gates of time emit a roar
so all-consuming that it’s heard no more
and on the wind that breath draws in arrives
your tenderest plea, your prayer that revives
love’s courage, buried deep within, to live
I rise into myself, more to submit
firm in submission that old self acquit
new forms to find, the mold of ‘new’ to split
this life is not my own, I recognize
the point made plainly by your searching eyes